I don’t recall trying to be friends with my children when they were young. I did treat them like people. I gave them respect, love, and attention but I also remained their mom. My mom was a great example to me of being a friend and mom; there were times I had a hard time finding the that line between the two rolls my mom played. I know it was hard for her at times and I’m sure she wanted to slap me sometimes. I know this because I felt the same way with my own kids at times.

I do have to say though, that it was definitely worth the effort, as it has made transitioning my relationship with my grown children rather easy. It was difficult on me as Brian moved out and he shifted his confidences away from me and to his fiance. It was as it should be but that didn’t make it any easier. I value all I have shared with my children. I am thankful for the relationships I have with each of them now and what I have with my daughter-in-love as well.

So, the road to where I am now, is one in which you talk with your children. Listen to them. Value what they have to say. Really listen to them. Spend time with them. Create wonderful memories with them so that even if they don’t remember them, you will.

I also recommend writing down things that you want to be sure to remember in later years! Time goes by so quickly, even though you don’t feel like it at the time and the memory doesn’t always recall the little moments you wish you could remember. Encourage your children to write things down too. I love it when I come across a journal entry my kids made; it generally brings a smile to my face.

Take time to develop a friendship with your children today that will be the foundation of your relationship as you enter the next season of life with your children all grown up. Remember to keep a balance to where you remain their mom, as they NEED a mom not a fan club. It is a fine line but worth the effort of developing.

Until next time, God bless,

Michele ºÜº

I have struggled with what to share today. I thought of sharing one of my favorite resources/links. I thought about coupling that link with a link for another website I just found recently that I like. Then I thought about sharing an article which is a tear jerker and many of you have probably already seen, about being mindful of the time between the birth of your child and his/her turning 18 years old. Then I thought about taking the easy way out and sharing an article from The Old Schoolhouse. But none of those options seemed right for today.

So I sit here, asking God what to share and it’s silent. Sometimes that is how my planning went for a new year of homeschooling my children. Just silent. In those times, I’d start writing down what I thought was best, what I’d felt nudged by from things I’d been reading, or just stick with the way we’d done things before. It was usually in those times of doing what I thought was best that we would end up overdoing it and everyone would get overwhelmed and then burn-out would come rearing its ugly head. It would stay that way until I either stopped and prayed about it or talked to Mike about it. Usually the answer was paring back some of the extra things I’d added or setting a time limit for how long to stay on a particular subject or loosen MY idea of how a certain thing should be approached.

One thing I’ve learned from my church is that you should not go changing things until you are certain you hear from God. If you are not certain that He is the one leading you to make a change then you should continue on the path that you are on currently, even if you ended up on that path by making a mistake.{ Making another mistake won’t make a right. Earnestly seek God and spend time waiting on Him listening for His still small voice.}

You see, those times that I added things to what we had been doing, were generally instigated by fear of not teaching my children something they “needed.” But in reality, I was giving them the necessary things already and the things I added were not necessary; at least, not in the way that I had added them, if at all. The answer would have been for me to spend more time praying about the subjects that I was feeling needed to be covered and asking God to lead me in HOW to cover them.

It is really important though to realize that God is full of grace for you and that He will help you when you take the time to ask. It probably won’t be on your time schedule but He will lead you, if you just WAIT on Him.

For the last couple of years Tiffany has been studying decorating. This is decorating for not only special occasions but also just every day making a house a home kind of decorating. She will be a wife and mother some day and we felt it would be a good idea for her to spend some time getting some fashion sense. I’ve never been very good at decor but then again, I’ve never really spent any time on the subject. Our house is an eclectic hodgepodge of things we’ve gathered over the years. In the beginning of our marriage it wasn’t much different – it was an eclectic hodgepodge of things people gave us. It never mattered because we have each other. But as I’m getting older, I would prefer things looking good rather than just thrown together or okay.

I’ve been desiring more Christmas decor and had even asked a friend of mine to come help me at one point but things got too busy for both of us, way too quickly and the season got away from us without her ever having the opportunity to come over and offer any suggestions. I had been stumped because we have no fireplace, no upstairs, which means no staircase bannister, no columns or beams, just our walls. Well, this year, Tiffany rummaged through stuff I’ve collected over the years and put garland around a few bedroom doors with a bow and then some added beads. It made the hallway look much more festive. She did this on her own. I don’t even think she knew I was wanting more. It just came naturally for her because she has been looking at Pinterest and magazines; she’s had her eyes trained for what looks good together and such. Now most people wouldn’t think of magazines and Pinterest for the basis of an area of study but it has worked for her.

It’s important not to put God or your child’s education in a box. Have an open mind and you may just find God leading you in extraordinary methods to accomplish the tasks at hand. Remember, God loves your children more than you do. He knows what they need when. If you seek Him, He will lead you for the best methods to teach your children what they need to know. I’ve taken comfort in knowing that because I have taught my children how to find the information they need, when they need it, they will never have a gap they cannot fill. In life, we don’t have to instantly know everything about everything. We usually have some time to research something out when needed.

I hope you will seek the Lord for what and how to educate your children and that you won’t box yourselves in to any one methodology. God is creative and will have the right plan for you and your children, even if that means your child checks the weather by swinging on the swingset outside instead of simply looking out the window.

Until next time, God bless,

Michele ºÜº