Yesterday was Valentine’s Day. I hope you made sure you spouse knows of your love and respect. Now, don’t leave it there; let him know each and every day that he is special to you. Take the moments to nurture your marriage – it doesn’t take much, just a little conscious effort.
Mike makes me a cup of tea, EVERY DAY! It’s just a small thing, but it is meaningful to me. I get up and make him breakfast, if he’s having any, and lunch, which started as an effort to save money. When the kids were young, it took a little more effort than it does today. But there are still some days that I just cannot manage to get it done be it because I’m not feeling well or overly tired and those days, he manages either by purchasing his lunch out somewhere or skipping the meal.
Here is an idea for you. You know how some people celebrate twelve days of Christmas by doing something special for their spouse each day. Well, Christmas can be a very busy time but February is not nearly as busy, so you could take the next ten or so days and do something special for your mate. It need not be anything BIG; it could be as simple as warming his towel in the dryer while he is taking a shower and then giving it to him to dry off with. (Warm towels are a joy to dry off with after a shower.)
Some other ideas would be to rub his neck, scratch his back, bring him his favorite drink, make him his favorite dessert, make sure you wear something he likes, or do a chore that he normally does. You could also share a little intimacy each evening.
If he didn’t meet your expectations yesterday, maybe you didn’t make your expectations clear to him. If something is important to you, it should be important for you to let him know what you need but be realistic.
One more thing, be generous! You may not have the funds to buy him things but you can still be generous in serving him, in making him the foods he enjoys, and in giving him your attention. (If your children are young, you can always put them to bed a little earlier or let them watch a movie and eat popcorn in their room, while mommy and daddy have some time alone.)
If he didn’t meet your expectations, be gracious. Maybe you expected too much or maybe he did too little; do NOT become bitter. Forgive. When you no longer have any hurt feelings over the situation, calmly talk about what each of you expects or would like. Communication if vital for a healthy marriage.
Until next time, God bless,