It had been a busy day and I was tired. I was cooking dinner when Mike and Sean got home from work. Evidently I was a bit snippy. Of course, I thought I was acting perfectly normal but then I got upset at something that was said. Again, I thought I was behaving within acceptable ranges.
As it turned out, I ended up getting frustrated several times in a very short span of time. It was then that I realized that although I may have “had a right” to be upset at what had been said, I have given up my right to be right and needed to change my attitude quickly.
Of course, that is easier said than done! I proceeded to take a couple of l-theanine, just in case I was having mood issues. I still had to make some attitude adjustments, putting aside my emotions and feelings of not being wrong.
Mike did his part as well. Before long, things were back to normal. However, things could have gone very differently; I could have ruined the whole evening by insisting that I was justified in my attitude and that it was all Mike’s fault.
You see, it doesn’t matter who is right and who is wrong. What matters is that Mike and I keep a good relationship. What matters is that we grow and mature. What matters is that we each put the other before ourselves. (Once again, I feel I must put out this disclaimer, that this is for normal marriage situations, not abusive ones.)
Mike and I vowed to be together for better or worse. Well, sometimes it seems a bit worse but that is okay. We just push on and work things out because that is what we vowed to do. Too many times people would rather quit than do the work necessary to keep their vows.
People get the feeling of falling in love confused with love. They miss the butterflies they felt when they first fell in love and confuse that, for no longer being in love. Love takes work and is more than a feeling. You can get those feelings back but you have to work at it. You have to be intentional. People get comfortable and caught up in the mundane tasks of living life and think they have fallen out of love with each other but this is not the truth.
Think about the things you did together when you fell in love. How did you act? What did you say? How did you fix yourself up? Are you still doing these things? Maybe it is time to return to some of them. Will it be easy? Probably not but I would bet it is better to rekindle the feelings you have with the one you vowed to be with than to scrap it all and find someone else.
Love is a commitment and takes work but it is worth it.
Until next time, God bless,