Here’s another sad truth: My nagging or griping about something he does or says will not change him either.
There is one thing I can change: ME. Yep, I cannot change anything about my beloved. I can only change me, how I react, how I speak, and what I do. Is this easy? Absolutely NOT! It is exceedingly difficult BUT I will be much happier when I do not react negatively to anything he says or does. The truth of the matter is that most of the time he is not meaning his words or actions to hurt me; usually it comes from his own frustrations and really doesn’t have much to do with me at all. Do I take it that way at the time? Nope! But this is something I’m putting to prayer and working on changing my reactions.
I’ve heard it said that the woman of the house sets the tone of the house and while I agree with that to a point, I also think the man of the house has much to do with setting the tone of the home as well.
See, my goal and heart’s desire is to be a helpmeet to Mike, make him feel blessed by having me as his wife, and to make him happy, which in turn makes me happy. Thus any time he is unhappy, it triggers a reaction in me that is either similar, defensive, or unfortunately, some other negative impulse. These things are not good! I can only change my reaction to him, no matter how much I want him to change his. I’m guessing he is working on himself and trying to get to a point that he doesn’t react to his frustrations — truth be told, he has changed some already in the 28 years we’ve been together.
So it all boils down to me! If I want things to be different, if I want to not have loud disagreements with Mike, if I realize the only one I can change is me, and if I don’t react to these situations then the situation will be “diffused” much quicker.
So, I continue to work on me as I pray for us both and respectfully challenge you to consider this.
Until next time, God bless,
P.S. After I had published this post, I found an article that seemed to go so well with what I had shared that I couldn’t help but add it on here. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.