Recently I’ve been struck with how Christians have made some mistakes where sex education are concerned. Yes, I said sex education. In their earnestness to convey that purity is of utmost importance and that sex outside of marriage is sinful, it seems it may have been misconstrued or merely misunderstood that all sex is sinful. When the truth of the matter is that God is the creator of sex. It is a beautiful and enjoyable thing inside the boundaries of marriage.
I know that we do not talk about the pleasantries of sex with our unmarried children so as not to make them want to experiment for themselves outside of marriage. But by only telling our children that sex is wrong outside of marriage, we could be setting them up for trouble once they are married.
I cannot remember what I told my oldest children about sex, as they are now 23 and 21. When my oldest got married, I made myself available to his wife, for any conversations she wanted to have. I encouraged her and told her that it was normal for there to be a “learning curve” in intimate things. I then shared with her a wonderful resource on To Love Honor and Vacuum by Sheila Gregoire, a series of posts entitled 29 Days To Great Sex, which you can find starting here. This was a help to her. I also recommended Shelia’s book The Good Girl’s Guide To Great Sex which is a great resource as well.
Recently I have made sure that my 17 year old daughter is aware that sex is a wonderful and enjoyable thing that God himself made. I let her know that God wants us to have sex and to enjoy it but only in the confines of marriage. I told her that she must be vigilant to keep herself pure until she gets married. She assured me that I had already given this knowledge; so for that I was grateful.
If you are struggling in intimacy with your husband, go to Sheila’s blog, work through the 29 Days to Great Sex series or buy her book based off the series, 31 Days to Great Sex and work through it with your husband. Please know that God created us to enjoy sex in marriage and that it is a wonderful thing that binds a man and a woman together in a unique way.
Also, pray about what to teach your children about sex and when to teach it to them; make sure they are prepared but not enticed to experience sex outside of marriage or jump into marriage without being ready to commit to forever, just to experience intimacy. God’s timing is never too late nor too early.
Until next time, God bless,